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Dine out often and you'll notice some themes repeat. Here are trends discovered in 2012 that I hope end with the calendar year:
Crunchy mac & cheese. This comfort food is best prepared and served so it's smooth and creamy. Skip the bread crumb topping.
Build-your-own. Like most grownups, I routinely prepare my own cocktails and meals at home. When I go out, I want to be served a completed recipe not the raw ingredients.
Shareable. This trend takes two forms: (1) You get served an empty plate. Then the food arrives in a big bowl or plate meant to be passed around the table. The assumption is that everyone seated at the table wanted to order the same thing off the menu. What it really means is that the most assertive person at the table wins. (2) Everything on the menu is served in two- to four-bite portions. The idea is that all dining companions will share and get to sample a greater quantity of menu items than might otherwise be possible. But what it really means is that you'll blow the budget before you can eat your fill.
Tiny cast iron serving dishes. Pulled from the oven and whisked to the table while still blazing hot, these little pots may be cute but give new meaning to the warning "that plate is hot." Forget moving these babies around the table, unless you brought your own oven mitt. The food inside takes what seems like forever to cool down enough to eat and, worst of all, keeps cooking and can quickly get overdone.
Sliders. This term used to be a derogative slur assigned to greasy fast-food hamburgers. Now upscale restaurants apply it to tiny burgers...usually served as a trio to encourage sharing. What was once an insult is now supposed to be cute. It's not.
Re-folding napkins. You place your cloth napkin on the chair when you head to the rest room. A server comes by and refolds it in an effort to demonstrate high-calibre service. But do you really think these servers wash their hands after each napkin is refolded? Do you trust them to notice that the guy at table 12 has a cold before they grab your water glass to refill it? I don't.
Hogging the spotlight. Celebrity chefs get all the attention, even when they get so famous that they're almost never at their restaurant. So what about the chef who actually works day after day, night after night preparing the food that the guests actually eat? It's time to pay attention to these folks doing the real work. Think about it: When you host a dinner party, do you take credit for cooking the meal or do you let your guests believe that it was all prepared by Betty Crocker (or whoever wrote the recipes you referenced)?
Restaurants that pretend to be generous. I agree with Ann Brenoff: Companies will jump on the trending bandwagon--whether it's Superstorm Sandy, the tragedy at Sandy Hook, cancer, autism or whatever they believe will lure sympathetic folks through their doors--and use it as a way to trumpet their generosity by pledging to contribute a percentage of all sales on a given day or night to the cause of the moment. "Pardon my suspicious mind, but this smells like a wolf of a Black Friday sale in sheep's clothing," says Brenoff. "The business wants to sell you stuff. If it wanted to make a donation to Sandy victims, it would simply write them check. Period. This is less an act of benevolence than it is a act of trying to boost sales." Disasters, diseases and other downers should not be leveraged as a marketing opportunity.
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